Mother’s Day plans

Today’s post is inspired by a conversation I had with my dear dear husband this morning. I’m writing this not to bash him but maybe to encourage some clueless husband somewhere who might read this someday because apparently it will never get through to my husband.

This morning he asked me if I wanted to do anything special for Mother’s Day. I inwardly rolled my eyes & asked him what he wanted to do for Father’s Day. I mean my point is that I want him to THINK. That is what would make an absolute special day for me. I don’t want any special meal. I don’t want to be taken out for any special meal. I don’t want jewelry or gifts. I don’t want him to clean the house (which btw is not sexy to me despite those little cartoon things floating around FB). I don’t want to be left in silence for the day. I don’t want a special trip or getaway planned. I don’t want a card or flowers. None of that means anything. Especially if it’s because I told him this is what I wanted. Now if he does any of that ON HIS OWN you better believe it will the best thing he could give me & I will show the most amount of gratitude because he THOUGHT of me all on his own. He had to think about what would make this a special day. What can I do to thank her for all she does as a mother for my child.

My first Mother’s Day was probably the most hurtful Mother’s Day. Why? Because it was any other day. Now if you have read my previous posts you will remember that I never thought I would be a mom. So I was excited for my FIRST Mother’s Day. He was detached throughout my entire pregnancy & even after. (PTSD post later). But I for some dumb reason thought this he’ll do for me because we have always been about celebrating firsts.

I’ve been married a time or two or three (oops) and I’m 6 years older than him & way more adventurous than he is so I’ve had plenty of firsts before him. From the beginning of our relationship if something was a first we would celebrate it. Naturally I thought this would be one of those occasions. I mean I already had an idea of what I wanted to do for his first Father’s Day, which I did do. Approaching dinner time when he was still sitting on his chair, where he’d been all day, he noticed I was sad & got it out of me. He then scrambled to do something. He roughly asked me what I wanted him to make me for dinner. (not good). I said “fuckin figure it out geez!) He googled something and sped off to the grocery store & we had a late dinner with both of us in a bad mood. Yay Mother’s Day …

Ok, I’ll stop bashing cause I didn’t set out to do that. But maybe a mom can commiserate with me having read all that bitchiness up there 😉

Look here’s how I see it. As women, especially stay at home moms, we only ask for 2 days. Mother’s Day & our birthdays. Or me anyway. The other 363 days of the year are us catering to our husband’s & kid’s every need & desire. I understand men don’t think the same as women. But some people like to use that as an excuse to be lazy about loving their wives/baby mamas. I mean let’s think about this, if women don’t think like men than why can so many of us change our own tires or change our oil or fix things when they break. I mean isn’t that all a “man’s thing”. If men aren’t made to think like women than why are there so many single father’s doing a better job of raising their kids than the mom was? See, just an excuse.

Oh one more point I want to make. I understand that a lot of men think that it’s not their responsibility to do anything for Mother’s Day for their wives/partners etc. because they aren’t their moms. Well ok yes this is true. However if the kids are small, it’s on you my friend. Also why not show your kids how to appreciate their mom? I mean if you never do anything for her than your kids won’t know that their supposed to. Get me?

Ok so lets wrap this up. Here’s what we need for Mother’s Day. To be thought of & shown that you took some of your precious man time to think about what can I do to show my wife/partner/baby mama etc. how much she means to me & our kids.

Ok for her sake, let me get you pointed in a direction:

A card. It can be a store-bought card but it will mean more if its made by the kids. When my son was 3 months old I made my husband a Father’s Day card. I put fingerpaint all over my son’s little chubby hands and let him go at it on this big card & then I “signed” it with his handprints. Every year I’ve helped my son make his dad a card. Some day it will be legible & not consist of swirly lines & dinosaur stickers but I think its more precious now.

Plan dinner. This means don’t ask her what she wants or where she wants to go. Save that for a Friday night treat. If you have a child with her, you know her well enough to know what she does & doesn’t like. This is my husband’s argument a lot. Hello 14 years together! Just saying… Oh and unless you make a killer BBQ it doesn’t count. Sorry.

Flowers. Not the cliché ones that you are seeing advertised everywhere. Think about what her favorite flower is. Which one does she go all squeaky high voiced when she see it? Get her some of those. Side note. Make sure she’s not allergic to them. I love love lily’s but if there is even 1 in this house I will sneeze my brain out of my face.

A pampering session. Depending on your budget this can be a pedicure which she hasn’t had time for in months or a massage from Massage Envy. Those are both inexpensive. If you have a bigger budget check out a higher end spa. Spend a few hundred bucks for an all day pampering session. Ooh another side note, don’t give her a gift certificate/card for it. She’ll never use it. Schedule it, drive her, pick her up. Oh if you are now thinking “hey I’ll make her one of those cute little coupon things for a massage from me”. Nope, don’t do it. You and I and her know that that massage is going to make you want sex 2 minutes into it and that is not a Mother’s Day gift.

Ok those are a few ideas to get you going but there are a lot more; picnic, hiking, scenic drive, day at the beach, amusement park, you get where I’m going.

One last note. I know it SEEMS like a good idea but unless you are going to clean it all up before she sees it, breakfast in bed is not a winner. Sleeping in also not going to work. My husband plans to let me sleep in sometimes but my son always comes to me because daddy isn’t paying attention fast enough. And that also goes with the idea of “I’ll be in complete charge of the kids all day”. Again not going to work. Good intention but the kids will end up back at mom if she is in the vicinity. You know it, I know it.

Here’s my last thing … Good luck!

 

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How Motherhood Has Changed Me … Part 2

Continued …..

To be honest, when I got pregnant I wasn’t really scared of giving up my old life. It was time. I was 35/36. And anyway I was going to be a different mom. I was not going to lose myself in motherhood. Uh uh. No way! And in many ways I haven’t changed. But in many ways I have. Let me explain.

Sleep Then : It used to be that I HAD to have at least 7-8 hours of sleep every night. I was convinced that I wasn’t any good with any less than that. Oh and I did not touch coffee. Nope! My mom has to have her coffee or you don’t want to talk to her and I was not going to be that way plus coffee is bad for you.

Sleep Now: Well if you’re a mom you know what I’m going to say. I’m lucky if I can get 5 hours. I actually got better sleep when he was a baby than I do now. He pretty much always slept through the night. After 3 months I could give him his last bottle at 11 and didn’t hear a peep until about 7. Somewhere around a year & a half is when he started waking up during the night. So long story short, at 4 years of age with him I get about 5 hours of interrupted sleep. Oh can I just mention (cause I’m mean) that dear husband has never, not even one time, gotten up with him. Ever. Did I mention Never? And up until about a month ago I HAD to have coffee every morning. Leave me alone until I’ve finished my cup. It’s actually not real coffee. It’s from a Keurig so its flavored.

Appearance Then: I already mentioned makeup done before leaving the house. Hair straightened because I have thick, coarse hair that doesn’t know if it wants to be wavy, curly or straight. And there’s always hair sticking up somewhere. Hence the must straighten hair necessity. Oh and salon products were a must. My clothes were nice & they were semi expensive. Not going to shop at Target, definitely not Wal-Mart (still don’t..)

Appearance Now: Oh if only you could see me right now at this moment. Here let me show you:

ImageImage

That pretty much represents me all the time now. Sometimes the hair is down but unless I’m going someplace nice, there is rarely make up on. And you know what? I don’t care. I am so comfortable with myself that I don’t feel like I need to put it on. Its not even about being lazy or short on time. It only takes me 5 mins to put on my makeup. I just feel good about myself and who I am & where I am in life. That’s really all I can say. Oh and I love Kohl’s & Ross. Why didn’t I shop there before??

Domestic Life Then: We’re talking housework, “Women’s work”. I have always hated doing anything housework related. When my mom would say “spring cleaning time” or whatever the case would be, I would go & not be found or have a headache or stomach-ache. Anything to get out of being cooped up in the house doing this stuff. Ugh no way! Not going to sew, knit, crochet, cook, etc. It’s just not me. It’s boring & a waste of my energy. In my adult life, my house was ok looking. If someone was coming over, I’d need advance notice or you are going to get a messy house. Dinner was either eating out or fast stuff. Box or bagged prep meals. Frozen food. Now don’t let all this make you think I’m a bad cook. I’m actually quite a good one. I’ve had compliments not complaints. People clean their plate & go for seconds. I just don’t like thinking about what to make & standing in front of a stove making it. I think there are other things I could be doing.

Domestic Life Now: My house is always clean. We’re talking dusting, mopping, vacuuming, bathrooms, windows. Even the ceiling fans get cleaned twice a month. I don’t mind. Its just part of my routine. I started following a program by Fly Lady & it changed how I feel about cleaning. I do a little bit every day. Maybe an hour or an hour twice a day. Company can come over anytime & I’d be fine with it. As far as cooking goes, still hate it. But it goes deeper into my childhood (same with dishes). But I cook pretty much every day. And like really cook. Especially in the last year I’ve been changing my cooking habits. More fresh veggies are involved. More elaborate recipe type food. Or experimenting. Actually the last month I’ve been switching to Paleo eating. I can’t go 100% Paleo though. I love my tortillas & alcohol 😉

Weekends Then: Oh gosh, my weekend usually started on Thursday but definitely every Friday & Saturday you could find me at a club. Yup just like the song. I called myself a “club rat”. I knew the bouncers, bartenders, DJs, other clubgoers. I was a regular. I loved it. I felt like I belonged. I danced, drank, socialized. I was always in my element at a club and always felt like I was finally in my own skin, which I couldn’t be in my outside life. I’d been doing this since I was 19 going to after hours clubs.

Weekends Now: My son goes to bed at 7ish and then hubby & I watch whatever we have DVR’d. Usually its a late night show from the night before. Jimmy Fallon, Jimmy Kimmel or Conan O’Brian. Or we watch a Netflix series. About 9:30 I’m nodding off but I’ll try & push it to 11. Sometimes we will pour some drinks and play a game. I’m actually totally fine with that. That’s a recent thing though. A year and a half ago I was still craving the night life. Now if someone is in town (I do live in Vegas after all), I am down on the Strip so fast with them and the old Gina is back. My cousin was here about a month ago and boy did I let loose at Senor Frogs in Treasure Island. I didn’t mean to. I mean we walked in & I was just standing on the edge of the dance floor checking things out. Next thing I know I am being tapped on the shoulder by one of the club organizers & encouraged to get up on a platform and dance. I mean what is an ex-club rat to do??? 2 hours later I was pooped! But man did I have so much fun. But motherhood does not escape. I got home at 3 am & guess who was up at 5:30? My dear old son. That was a tough day! My point of this one was that 97% of the time I am watching late shows & in bed by 10 on a weekend night & am so content with that.

Ok last thing. Guess who does her own hair & nails? This girl! I mean I’m a stay at home mom on an Army budget. I can’t afford professional coloring every 2-3 weeks which is where I’m at now with my age & stupid gray hairs. And I have a large collection of nail polishes. No more twice a month nail salon visits for me. Again I’m totally fine with that.

The one thing that hasn’t changed though is my car. I still have a nice car. But I need one. Every girl needs a little sparkle.

Oh one more thing. I still dance. Only it’s not on a dance floor or stage or platform. It’s in the living room with my son.

Now THAT is the Good Life…

How Motherhood Has Changed Me … Part 1

Gosh where to begin…

To say that I was a wild child is probably a pretty accurate statement. I’m sure as a kid, I was a good one. Or so my mom says. But in my teens I just couldn’t get enough of experiencing life. I’m still like that actually. Anyway, high school was “the shit” for me. I loved everything about it, except having to sit in class & pay attention lol I used to get bathroom passes a lot & then wander the campus to see who I could find that was also on a “bathroom pass”, and believe me there were quite a few of us. Don’t take it the wrong way though, I still had pretty good grades. I believe my GPA was a 3.88. That’s pretty good right? Of course my mom says if I had just “applied myself” I could have had a 4.0 but where I’m from during those years being smart was so very not cool.

Back then I did a lot of closet partying. Meaning I snuck out a lot to do it. My parents (my mom really) were very strict. I couldn’t wait to get out of the house. I got a job at 15 so I could have my independence. I worked all through my junior & senior year and then after I got off work would go hang out at a co-workers house. The place I worked at was a lot of partying in the building & out. Perfect place for me!

After graduation, I moved in with my manager, then broke up, then got back together & got married, then he cheated on me so I moved back out. All that took place in just 1 year. But listen I’m not gonna lie, I was very not ready for marriage. I was 18. When we got back together he was in basic training & then AIT. 3 days before he came home on leave I went to a Metallica concert and made out with a guy in the parking lot after. I mean really?? So getting divorced was really not a big deal. 2 weeks after I got home I was dating a guy.

Wow, anyway getting way off track! To me life was about having fun. Enjoy ever minute of every day. Have adventures. Be successful & independent. Travel. Have expensive things. Sleep! And that’s what I was doing. Once I realized in my 20s that having kids probably wasn’t going to happen, I kinda just got ok with it and decided to do things that people with kids can’t do. I traveled a lot with my husband and with my mom/parents.

I worked out. Had my makeup done every day, never went out the door without it on. I went to an upper end salon & got my hair professionally cut, colored & straightened every 2 months. I focused on being good at whatever job I had so that I could have the freedom that a lot of money brings. We bought everything we wanted. I had a very nice car. My husband had his dream truck. I went out every weekend with friends or myself. My husband & I went out to dinner all the time. That was the good life for me.

To be continued …

What a Week!

Today is Tuesday & already I feel overwhelmed! Last week had so much going on that its hard to know where to begin. I think I’ll start with the interesting thing I learned about myself last week.

So hmm… lets just say I have a very hard time losing weight. There was a time in my life, my 30s, that I was in great shape. On my husband’s first deployment I dropped from a size 16 to an 8 just in the year he was gone. When he came home, I did go up a bit but it was maybe to a size 10. I pretty much kept that way until my son was born. So lets skip forward a bit. For the last 2 years I have struggled so much with my weight. Before we got transferred here to Vegas, we were in WA and I was attending the YMCA about 2-3 times a week. I did spin class each of those days plus a little cardio before to warm up. One time spin class was cancelled & I just spun away myself for an hour. I mean I was dedicated. Still no weight loss.

When we moved here I realized that I couldn’t hide under hoodies anymore. People here don’t wear a lot of clothes because its HOT in the summer. I needed to trim down. I started on an HCG drop called Omnitrition. It worked so well for a close friend of mine as well as many many others. First week I did great. I lost 10 lbs! That was it. I stayed on it for 21 days just hoping it would kick in. It didn’t. I wasn’t losing weight, I was starving, I was moody, I was losing hair, I was passing out, I was sick. Literally! I went to the Dr & he said get off them immediately. It took me almost 3 months to recover from that. Ok so then I joined the gym. Gold’s Gym. Love them! I even hired a trainer. Fast forward 6 months to now. I’ve actually put ON weight. I haven’t lost any inches. I’ve changed my eating. I’m making the switch to Paleo (more on that another time). I tried the Shred Diet & the Super Shred Diet. I am a distributor of It Works Global which are amazing products to help you tone & tighten. Because I sell them, I get to try them. Again for me, I haven’t had the amazing results others have. I’m telling you nothing helps me. My trainer is baffled & says she feels like she failed me. She totally didn’t. My body failed me.

So finally I made an appt to see a female Dr. Not an OB/GYN but like a Dr who is female. Maybe she’ll understand better than the male Dr I had tried to talk to about this last month. Plus I just feel like I have hormone issues. I am getting old after all 😉 Anyway, so she starts asking me things, looking at my chart & just really listening to me. And she says, you have PCOS. Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome. She asks if anyone has ever discussed this with me? I said umm… nooo …. She says she can do an ultrasound but really it will just be a waste because she is very familiar with it and I have every sign of it. So what are we talking here? Ok lets go through it…

1. Irregular or missing periods – Check

2. Weight gain or inability to lose weight – Check

3. Hair in places you don’t want it or a lot of hair – Check (yeah kinda embarrassing, I just figured its because I’m Mexican & we have a lot of hair. But I do pluck a lot of random hairs from places there shouldn’t be….)

4. Hair Loss – Check (I lose a lot of hair off my head. It annoys my husband. But I have a lot of hair on my head so I figured it was just that)

5. Acne – Ah ha! No Check! Well acne also means dandruff & dry flaky skin everywhere …. Damn! – Check

6. Infertility – Check

7. Skin tags – Check

8. Depression – Check

So do you see why I was frustrated that she is the first Dr in 10 years of dealing with this to even consider this? I mean we did years of infertility treatment. Why wasn’t this considered??

I mean honestly, I know its weird but I actually felt relieved that she diagnosed me with this because this means there is something that can be done to help me. She prescribed me Metformin which I know everyone who has PCOS takes. I pray that this is the answer for me. Not necessarily in the baby making department anymore. I had my son, I’m 40. I’m fine. I want this to resolve my weight issues. It is so discouraging going to the gym 2-4 times a week & cutting out all the “fun” foods & still put on weight. I need an answer.

Stay tuned to see if this is it….

 

Getting to know all about you ….

Ok so here’s a “fun” game I saw the other day. Its called getting to know the person behind the screen. Since you’ll hopefully be with me for the long haul you should understand some things about where my mind comes from. Ready? ….

Name: Gina Mauro

Age: 40 (told you I was old!)

What’s my sign: So much Scorpio going on here!

Status: Married since Oct 2000

Kids: Just my one boy, he just turned 4 but he thinks he’s in charge of me

Pets: My Shih Tzu Rocco, he’s 6 and way more clingy than my son!

Siblings: (gonna brag a bit) I have an older brother who is a professional photographer specializing in Architectural design. He owns his own business in Denver. He is amazingly creative. I mean this guy used to lock himself in his bedroom for days painting the most out of this world indescribable paintings. Clearly all the creative genes were used up on him because I can’t draw a stick figure! I just realized he needs to be a blog post of his own. I also have another amazing brother. This one is 10 years younger than me and he was always more my child then that sibling rivalry thing. He is strong & the rock of his family. He’s a paramedic and does and sees things most people cringe away from.

Names I go by: Gina (obviously), Reggie (only by my dad, my real name is ReGina), G (by family & those closest to me) babe, baby, mama, Nina (by my bff), mija (Spanish for daughter)

Occupations: Well right now I am a stay at home. I’ve had a lot of different jobs but this is the best I’ve ever had. I worked at Taco Bell in high school, been a server at JBs (AZ restaurant) and Dennys (where I met my old man). I’ve worked in accounting & billing. I was a medical assistant, a realtor & a car salesperson. Told you I’ve had a lot. Right now I am also a Distributor for It Works Global, we sell body wraps & supplements.

Education: High school of course, then I did community college, trade school, university, community college again, trade school again and finally real estate school. Of course that wasn’t one after another. Just all I’ve done since I graduated from high school when I was 17.

A few of my Favorite things:

Color: mmm probably dark purple most of the time but pink sometimes too.

Food: Mexican for sure, then Italian. Pizza. I could eat pizza every day and ice cream! However right now I’m making the switch to Paleo eating and that’s not fun 😦

Non-Alcoholic Beverage: Water with Crystal Light liquid stuff in it (pls save me the aspartame lecture. I know it, I’ve heard it, I ignore it. Thank you)

Alcoholic Beverage: Now that’s a good question. I don’t drink beer or wine. Yuck. I love Margaritas. I also love coconut Rum & whipped Rum. Mmm! We’ll just leave it at that right now 😉

Number: 17 Just because that was the best year. It’s not a lucky number or anything. I just like it (and PS it’s not a part of my password stuff either so don’t get any ideas! lol)

Flower: I love white roses and daffodils. I don’t like red roses because people abuse them. They are so cliché they don’t mean anything anymore.

Books: Man anything really. I love reading. Ok I guess not anything. I don’t like romance novels. They are silly. I used to be all about them but now they just annoy me. I mean it’s not the real world. I love reading historical fiction. Right now I’m really into American historical fiction. I like reading historical non-fiction too though. I just love learning.

Movies: Funny movies but not spoof movies. Those aren’t funny to me. I like belly laugh movies. I do like some dramas too but not really because life is drama & movies are supposed to take us out of our world for a bit. At least that’s how I look at movies. Before my son was born we went to the movies a lot. I mean there really weren’t any movies we wanted to see because we saw them all as new releases at the theater. Now that my son is getting older we are starting to go to movies again with him. His first movie was Frozen. He was very behaved during it.

TV Shows: Well I love reality and I’m not ashamed to admit it! But not all reality. I’ll give something a shot but if there is too much ghettoness or drama, I’m out. I don’t think we really watch live TV though. We DVR everything & watch it when my son goes to bed. But don’t mistake me as one of “those parents” that say “oh I don’t watch TV. I have other things going on” I have other things going on too but I love watching TV and thank God for DVR! So lets see we’ve watched all the House of Cards, Boardwalk Empire, etc from Netflix. And we watch the late night shows via DVR. Conan, Jimmy Fallon & Jimmy Kimmel.

Music: I love just about all of it. I’m not into jazz or classical though. And some country I can’t do because it’s depressing. I like feel good pump me up music. My iPod goes from Metallica to Britney Spears to Kanye to Pink … you get the idea… Oh I love 80s music. All of it!

Random Facts about me:

I am an ex-club rat. Not a reformed mind you because when a friend is down for a good time its to the club we go! I’m just not a 4 day a weeker anymore. I might go every few months when someone is in town.

I don’t believe in love at first sight. I think love goes deeper. At first sight is attraction. Love comes from really getting to know someone’s heart. You can’t know someone’s heart the first time you see them.

Oh, I’m an ex-smoker. I smoked off and on (mostly on) from the time I was 12 until 2 weeks before I got pregnant, so 35 years old. I’ve had a few after that but the taste makes me sick now. However I still am for smokers rights. I will stand up with smokers for those rights.

I say “it is what it is” way too much. And “awesome” and “shit” and some other words we won’t mention…

I think I peaked in high school. I had the best time then. I had tons of friends & boyfriends & so much fun. I didn’t go to a lot of parties because I worked but after work was a different story with my co-workers. Oh I ditched a lot. But believe it or not I still had really good grades. I’m not someone who has to work too hard for them. Not saying I’m “all that” I just don’t think high school was hard.

Believe it or not I am very strong in my faith. My husband doesn’t get it because he didn’t grow up with religion. I’m catholic & I believe in the core values of the catholic church. I don’t believe in swaying from my values & I don’t want to be talked out of them. I think whatever you believe is up to you and that’s your thing and more power to you but this is what I believe & let me believe it.

Here’s an odd one. I believe in ghosts & spirits. I’ve seen them. Believe me or don’t but I have. My grandma’s property was haunted (another blog post) and we’ve all experienced & seen stuff there. I mean going all the way back to my mom’s cousins 70 years ago. Like I said another post. Oh, I don’t believe in aliens.

I still talk to a lot of my high school friends. Thank goodness for Facebook. Say what you will about Facebook but I love it. I had so many experience with my friends back then that its nice to still be a part of each others lives.

And last but not least, I am a huge animal lover. I like to say I like animals more than people. With an animal what you see is what you get. But it goes beyond that. I have a connection with them. I lost my cat a few years ago but prior to that she had gotten very sick & was on her deathbed according to the vet (after $600 mind you). We had one last shot and it involved nursing her back to health. I didn’t hesitate. She stayed with me another 3 years before she had a stroke & we had to put her down. She was 13. With my dog Rocco, this past Christmas he got an eye infection after trying a new groomer. After 6 weeks of vet apps & meds we thought that was it he was going to lose his eye but he came out of it ok. This was 6 weeks of me giving him eye meds twice a day. The meds made him sleepy and he would sleep in my arms. I’d do anything for animals. We recently got fish. My male guppy didn’t make it. I cried. I would have given him mouth to mouth if I could. My husband says I go too far.

Well now you know way more about me than you probably wanted to 🙂

How I Became A Mom

Ok now take your mind out of the gutter! The way people normally get pregnant was not the easy way for us. There was actually a lot more involved.

I knew from my late teens/early 20s that getting pregnant probably was not going to happen for me. I’m not going to tell you HOW I knew only that I had a lot of fun in my mid to late teens. Hey I’m an 80s child! We didn’t really know the dangers. The kids now are a lot smarter than we were then…well some of them 

Anyway, my husband & I started wanting kids around the time I was 30. We tried the traditional way for awhile & it didn’t work. So then I started doing research & I started charting & tracking things. I really got to know how my body worked. But still no luck. And of course all this was happening in between deployments. So the years went by and I’m getting older & older which means according to medical knowledge it should be getting harder to get pregnant. Wonderful.

Eventually we started infertility treatment. We were fortunate in that the military pays for certain treatments and up to a certain point. The first time I was on something, Clomid I think, I got pregnant. Yeah! I found out about a week or so after my husband left on deployment 2. Well at about the 7 1/2 week mark, I miscarried. As you can imagine, I was devastated. Not only because of the loss but because I was going through it on my own & my husband was having to suffer on his own. I probably stayed in bed for a week and then didn’t leave my house for another 2 weeks.

Anyway, enough of that. It still makes me sad to remember. When my husband came home we got back on meds & then added in artificial insemination. Long story short, I did 6 rounds of Femera alone, then in addition to that med, we did about 3 rounds of artificial insemination. Of course none of it worked. 

At that point, we were pretty much done. Done with the treatment and done with each other. It puts a lot of stress on a couple. Another deployment had gone on during this time too. And I had lost my cat that I’d had for 13 years the year before. So we decided it was time to stop everything and just heal for a little while. We got our names on the IVF list, which is something we said we’d never do. Never say never I’ve learned. And we got a dog. More on that another time 

So then my husband got orders to transfer to Missouri. Long story short, 2 weeks after I got there (he went 2 months before me) we got pregnant. Completely on our own. The meds had worn off by then and I wasn’t tracking anything because we weren’t trying. So all those people that used to annoy me by saying to “just relax” were right! And now I tell people that. I tell people to stop trying & get a dog! That’s what worked for us!